Friday, February 27, 2009

Douche bag Ex-Boyfriend

Haha, this was fun for me. I have the music done as well, but probably won't have the chance to post the music right now. Thanks to Jimmy and Nathan for helping with this. I think there are a lot of women and men that can relate to this.

Douche bag Ex-Boyfriend

So he calls you a whore,
Even though you made his last truck payment.
He has a goatee the size and shape
of a small Arab country.
He cuts the sleeves off all of his t-shirts.

He hasn't had a job in three months,
But he does some construction on the side.
But all the money he makes
He uses for getting high,
Or for fixing up the system in his 'ride.'

His back is full of hair;
You won't admit that he's fat.
And nobody talks about his daddy like that!

If you have a douche bag ex-boyfriend,
Then we won't be able to date.
Let me save you the trouble
By calling this off early,
'Cause you'll probably just go back to him anyways.

He uses his kid against you.
He likes cutting down all your shows.
He has a tattoo in old English.
He f-ing loves pit bulls.
And he sends you 20,000 texts in a day.

He hates your best friend Amy.
He steals money from his mom.
When you broke up the last time
He stalked you for two weeks
And punched a hole in your bathroom door.

He wears a cross around his neck,
But never goes to church.
And nobody's going to tell him what to do when he's at work!

If you have a douche bag ex-boyfriend,
Then we wont be able to date.
Let me save you the trouble
By calling this off early,
'Cause you'll probably just go back to him anyways.


(A few more reasons for not dating you if you have a douche-bag ex-boyfriend)

Reason one:
He'll try to beat me up.
Reason two:
He'll try to hurt himself and call you
Then you'll feel sorry for him
And you'll have sex again.

Reason three:
He'll say that I've been talking shit,
But I don't even know what that is.
Reason four:
It'll make me feel so small
When you chose him
Over me after all.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

So I'm not unbreakable? Drat!

This is Chase inserting his foot in his mouth. "I never get sick, I have a great immune system, blah blah, blah." Now tell that to your ceiling as it is about the only thing you have looked at the past three days as you have laid in your bed, what could have well been your death bed.

Whew, in case you haven't figured it out, I haven't posted in a while... reason: I have been sick. I usually get bored listening to people tell me how they are sick, its not that I don't care about them or feel bad, its just kind of like small talk. So I will give you the more colorful explanation of my pain as I described to one of my friends. This is a thought that ran through my head in the midst of my sickness:

"This must be what it feels like to turn into a werewolf. To have your entire DNA and physical makeup transform altogether into something else. Something evil... and painful... and wretched."

Haha, I'm weird I know, but keep in mind I was a little delusional at this point, and to me this made a lot of sense.

"What did you have, a cold?"
"No, I almost turned into a werewolf."

Good thing was, I was able to come out of the sickness long enough to do my show and it went very good. Gave me back some confidence in my performing abilities, and restored my love for performing all together. You see for people that don't know being a good songwriter and being a good performer are as different as say um, being a good farmer and being a good chef. Sure there are things that are relatable, but a completely different set of skills are required. I am getting better at both, and doing both more make me grow as a musician, artist, and performer. It was very fun and I thank everyone that was able to come.

I am in the process of writing my 'Song of the Week' still. Even though I am busier than I one legged man in an ass-kicking contest from being out of work so long. But in light of all this, the song of the week is going to be funny, not serious. I need a break from that for a while. And what with the economy and the wars and the sickness going around, you guys do too.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

First Star on the Right

This isn't the best vocal performance I've ever done, for sure, but after being sick last week, and still sick this week. I decided to video post based on the good response I got from the words posted last week. For those of you who did not read last week's entry, I wrote this song for one of my favorite shows: 'Lost.' I kept the vocals and guitar strum in the verse softer and more dreamy, than I usually do, this helps contrast the chorus and speaks to the mysterious elements of the show as well.


Monday, February 16, 2009

Musical Status

A quick update on what I am doing musically. My goals for January were not quite met, but I did accomplish the following:
  • Played two venues
  • Recorded one song
  • Maintained my blog and wrote some new songs
  • 90% Finished with my website (have a good friend writing some more professional text as we speak)
  • Created fan pages on myspace and facebook (with the help of Lindsey)
  • Taken some promotional photos (with the help of Stephanie
I'm not going to play out a whole lot until I finish recording two more songs. That way I can use the songs to get into more venues, try and get them into some soundtracks, and have a small single I can sell at shows.

By the way, for any local blog followers: I will be playing with Jimmy (the guy you see pop in my videos from time to time) at the Courthouse Cafe on the square in Shelbyville this Saturday from 7 to 10 PM. If you are looking for something a little different to do this weekend you should drop by and listen. It should be a very laid-back, mellow time. We are playing acoustically, with minimal percussion, and the place seems like it will have a very complimentary atmosphere.

Thursday, February 12, 2009


I finished my 'Song of the week' last week, so in a lot of ways I was ahead of the game. For the the words, I decided to be inspired by my favorite show: 'Lost.' The idea is that if Lost was a movie, this song could be on the soundtrack.

So, I sit down to record my song and half way through it my 'A' string breaks. Drat.

Yesterday at lunch I get my guitar re-strung, now flash forward to last night after Lost. I pull out the guitar, go to sing, and... my voice is cracking and I am slowly losing it. I had been coughing all day, and by the end of the night I could barely talk, much less sing.

Because of breaking guitar strings and faulty vocal chords, my song will have to be words only this week. I will try to get the recorded version very soon.

First Star on the Right

Time and the space in between.
My eyes and what I've never seen.
A cold conclusion it seems:
To wait.

Home is such a long way away,
Years or even miles into space.
Your hand is a warmth on my face;
It can stay.

Carry me,
Take me back home.
First star on the right
And strait on 'till dawn.
Carry me,
Take me back.

It's odd, it seems out of place.
The stars, the moon, and its face
Appear and in an instant erased
By the clouds

Holes for what use to be eyes.
Bright and inadmissible light.
Confused by the language of lies,
I survive.

Carry me,
Take me back home.
First star on the right
And strait on 'till dawn.
Carry me,
Take me back.

There's bound to be something I've missed.
Didn't think it would come to this.
There's no way to leave it as-is.

Carry me,
Take me back.
Carry me, we
Have to go back.
Carry me home.

Monday, February 9, 2009

Hannah's Song

This is one of the sweetest things of all the time. It is my daughter, Hannah, ad-lib singing to some piano and drums that she picked out in one of my recording programs. She just started singing off the top of her head, only sang for a couple measures, but it is still so sweet. Her singer-songwriter dad couldn't be prouder! Keep in mind she is four.

I have transcribed her words to the best of my ability, here is what I call 'I Have You.'

I Have You
by Hannah Perryman

I know there is that I have you.
I have songs for you can sing.
Nobody sees why you have my mouth.
I have you and long for you.

Don't forget me; I have you.
I don't want to story you.

Friday, February 6, 2009

Surveying on Mars

I could get in trouble for showing this a month before its publication, but Clint and I had fun with this and I wanted to share it. To clear up the survey jargon, canopy is any obstructions to the view of satellites, i.e. trees, tall buildings, etc.

For those of you who don't know, on the side of everything else that I do I draw a surveying cartoon for a surveying magazine. I don't expect you to find this humorous unless you are a surveyor, I just liked their little space suits.

A quick shout out to Daniel and Kevin at Hayes for helping me brainstorm.

Song of the Week: 'Cold Lies'

Cold Lies

Cold lies
A thin glass
On the other side
Of my face
Told to believe
There's a reason
For all that's been done

As I pull
The window down
In comes the sound
From the cars
That drive on their way
To the people they love
While I wait for others to come

Tell the water to run
Despite of all the things that I've done
I can't lay down my guns
When my hands are tied at the thumbs

A bell chimes
One times nine
Through the cold air climbs
Finds a place in my ear
Evidence here
That time truly waits for no man

The swan sings
A delicate thing
On a pendulum swings
Her heart in route to my hands
Feeble plans that we make
Creatures that break into sand

Tell the water to run
Despite of all the things that I've done
I can't lay down my guns
When my hands are tied at the thumbs
Wouldn't be too much harm
But there's just so much room in your arms

It's a shame
The oceans can't freeze
The tide that's in me
Is the same
That churns in its wake
Controlling the same
The land is the victim indeed

The rain beads
On the window now
A glimpse of how
All thoughts can bleed into one
And all I have done
A collection of what I've become
Due to the wordiness of this song, it took me about eight takes to get it right. I'm not going to do the rating thing like I did last week. It was too clunky, and besides YouTube has the ability to rate videos.

What I was trying to establish was a way to get more feedback on my new 'Song of the Week.' Thanks to all my regulars, you guys give me very good input. If you are new here, don't be afraid to tell me what you think.

Thursday, February 5, 2009

'Cold Lies' to Come

Due to my sickness and traveling last week, I obliged everyone with Jimmy and I playing a version of Gangsta's Paradise instead of writing and casting a new song. It has been a struggle this week, but I just finished the new song last night.

'Cold Lies' is kind of an oddity. Once I have a good tune, it typically doesn't take me long to write a song. This song , however, took me hours to write. It's not that the ideas, words, or music is all that complicated; it's that I wasn't feeling inspired but I forced myself to write as if I was a professional.

Writers are the only ones attributed with having 'blocks', but we all have blocks. As a designer there are times when I feel as creative as brown paper sack, but I have to force my way through it and sometimes the results are just as good as those 'inspired' times.

So look for the new video later tonight or in the morning, it's a good 'Chase' song. No doubt I am forming a style.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009